The Importance of Building Self-trustworthiness...

This is a topic that I have wanted to write about for quite sometime now...the importance of this fact struck me very hard when I heard to a guest lecture at my college by Alok Sharma - India Head, Apple Computers

This guy, with his simple but absolutely dignified demeanor left me convinced about a thought that I have always believed it - the importance of having a clean conscience and building respect for oneself in one's own eyes. How does one build trustworthiness - with oneself and others? I believe, it is by defining one’s values, principles and rules in life and living by it, come what may. Honoring a promise made to oneself. A person who can do this will automatically build trust about himself/herself with people around.

Mr. Sharma spoke about the emphasis he lays on the importance of living by his beliefs and values in life - that of righteousness. He quoted an example where he put his job at stake to avoid paying bribe in a business deal - this incident irked questions from the audience about how one can survive in this bad world if we were to follow such rules or stick to such principles. In response to this, he quoted an incident where he happened to meet Azim Premji who gave a simple answer to this so called difficult question - Azimji's answer -"One does not get profitable by paying bribes to middlemen, in fact the returns get reduced - because, once a set-up is created using middlemen to get work done, the expectation increases at each level,and at the end, though the number of projects got is more, the returns definitely get diminished, as so many people need to be satisfied in between" - So true, but this is beyond understanding of 99 percent of the people.

But one thing is certain- I believe, the moment you make your principles clear to people and set their expectations right, how much ever they might bad mouth you in front of you as well as behind your back - they will dare not try any tricks with you. All the blabbering they do in front of you about how foolish you are to follow Gandhism - if I can say so- they do it only because they do not have the guts to be like you or follow the path of righteousness. Of course, there are many people who respect such values and principles in life - otherwise, there would not be a Infy or a Wipro or a MindTree Consulting...am sure there are many more, which do not come to my mind now...

Once we have all this defined, building a personal & organizational value system becomes easier - even if we cannot change much of organizational values, we can surely change the organization -but for that we need to define and prioritize our values in life.

Among many things that he spoke about, something that I remember very well is the leadership attributes one should develop - Beliefs,Values,Character,and Knowledge. To quote him -" As a good manager, hire people who can perform at least one function better that you can do"- In this world of insecurity, managers could probably take a cue from these lines.

Last but not the least, he spoke about how simple day-to-day things in our life can help us build self trustworthiness - something which I regularly follow - I could relate to it so much...I'm sure most of us can relate to it...take for example -practicing a fitness regime - it is so common for all of us to plan with great passion to run 5 km or go to gym for 30 mins daily or cut down on all our favorite food - only to end up doing 1/10th or none of what we planned and feeling terribly depressed about not being able to follow what we set out to do.

Believe me, these small promises made to oneself and not being able to fulfill them can bring one's morale down to a large extent. At least to me, fulfilling any commitment made by me to myself or to anyone is of utmost importance, else something inside my heart troubles me endlessly. Alok gave a simple suggestion of how it is better to set small goals and fulfill them, instead of making big plans only to see them fail. Taking the same fitness example - set short-term goals, probably going to gym 2 -3 times in a week or running 2 km daily or 3 days a week or whatever is comfortable for one -but, keep up the promise made and achieve those goals. This is what builds self-trustworthiness.

This thing about building self-trustworthiness is so satisfying, especially the act of following a short but regular fitness regime is so fulfilling to me...that I came back from my jog today and immediately decide to write this blog.

The run...the sweat...the satisfaction of doing what I promised myself...the pride of bettering myself everyday...its an amazing feeling!

There are so many instances which we can use to practice this and enrich our lives – be it at work (setting short internal deadlines for activities at work) or at home (following a well planned regime for day-to-day chores, cooking, cleaning etc…) or with our social life(control over spending or over indulging)…once we start doing it for one or two activities, automatically we search for fulfillment and meaning in everything that we do…I’m trying, failing at times, learning, nevertheless -getting back on my feet and trying harder…I want it to be a continuing journey, though it is tough and slow...it is better than quickly achieving something and losing it much before we realize what we achieved.